Life Lessons I Learned from High School

1. If you're going to do something halfway, you might as well not do it at all.

Seriously, don't do it. Being simply okay at everything is not nearly as amazing as being super great at one thing. It's much better if you're amazing at one thing. I tried to be editor of the school's yearbook and officer on our dance team at the same time. I wasn't as good an officer or editor. It wasn't worth it. Don't do things halfway.

2. Your attitude is a choice.

You choose how you feel about something. Personally, I choose to be positive. Even when things go absolutely awful, I can choose to be positive. There was this one day where I was late to school, had to take a really hard test that I thought I failed, dropped and cracked my phone, and it was raining, but I was okay. True, I could've spent the whole day upset with myself for being late and not studying more, angry about my phone, and bitter because of the rain, but that wasn't going to change the situation. I'm not even saying to find the positive in a situation because to this day, it's tough to tell you the positive of that day, I'm simply saying that being bitter about what's already happened isn't worth it. Instead, choose your attitude, and choose to be positive.

3. Even if everyone else is doing drugs, don't do them.

For some reason, people think that being in high school (ESPECIALLY senior year) is like a right of passage to do drugs (I include underage drinking in this "do drugs" category). I don't know why. All i know is that the number of people that I know who drink and do drugs has increased exponentially in the last four years to the point where I can literally make a list of people I'm friends with who don't drink, and it'd probably not even take up a whole page. It's sad that so many people think drinking and drugs are okay, but YOU DON'T HAVE TO JOIN THEM. I'm friends with people who drink, and they don't pressure me. You just have to be upfront with how you feel. I won't even be around drinking because I think it's wrong, so people don't drink around me. If I'm around, they'll generally avoid it. If they don't, I leave, and if they plan on drinking, I don't get invited. I still have plenty of friends. Furthermore, my closest friends, who also don't drink or do drugs, and I have more fun. I hear stories from weekends that I was not invited to, and I simply laugh at how stupid they sound. Drinking causes a lapse in judgment and people do things that they wouldn't otherwise do. I can assure you that my weekend where we played mini golf at Adventure Landing and then went to Chili's for skillet queso and lava cake was much more fun than their drunken party where some people hooked up and everyone is a bit hazy on the details. Listen to your elementary guidance counselor: drinking and drugs is NOT WORTH IT.

4. Don't let other people define you.

If you let other people's judgments define you, you will be unhappy. You cannot please everyone. Everything I'm saying right now is super cliche, and you're probably rolling your eyes. These things are cliche because they're true. Everyone says them because they're true. People are going to judge you. You can be the most awesome person in the whole wide world, and you will be judged. As long as you know that you're stinkin' awesome, it shouldn't matter. 

5. Resilience... again.

I've now gone to 3 school dances, but I have not been asked to any of them. I've had to ask a date myself 3 different times because no one asked me, and that was hard. In my school, people get asked to dances in really cute, all out ways, and I have yet to experience that. I also don't expect to be asked to prom (this is not me being down on myself, this is me being realistic. I'm really okay with it. I promise. I'm over it). Around school dances, I would become an emotional wreck, freaking out about not being asked. It was not fun, but I would ask someone myself and still have a great time at the dance. I once again, had to learn to be resilient and not let these obstacles and hardships get me down.  Life is hard, and not being asked to a school dance is not a big deal. Life gets much harder, and I can't let life stop me. 

Life Lessons I Learned from Middle School

1. Middle school isn't as awkward as everyone says it is. 

This is a tricky one because middle school definitely is awkward. You're growing. You're not mature yet by any means, but you still don't want to be treated like a child, despite the fact that you 100% are a child. People are going through puberty. All of those things are very awkward, but you have to remember: everyone is going through the exact same awkwardness (except for me, but I'll get to that later). Yes, your expander that gives you a lisp, bangs, and clothes that don't fit right because your body is changing are all very awkward, but everyone else has the exact same problems! Because everyone is all dealing with the same things, no one notices anyone else's awkwardness. It really works out kind of perfectly... unless you're me.

2. "Body changes" are not the only awkward thing in middle school.

This isn't second semester of 8th grade...
This is the END of middle school,
and I was still this weird...

I did not "become a woman" until I was 16 years old, the summer after my sophomore year in high school, so when all of my middle school friends were dealing with their body changing, dealing with "aunt flo," and buying bras for the first time. I wasn't. I wore a 32AAA bra in the 7th grade because I didn't have any boobs, but I needed to wear something because I had to change in the locker room with everyone for PE. Needless to say, I got made fun of for my "bra. (honestly, I don't even think you could call it a bra)." I had to shop at Limited Too until halfway through freshman year because my body hadn't grown enough for me to fit into teenager clothes, so while all my friends started shopping at Hollister, Aeropostale, and American Eagle, I was stuck searching Limited Too for clothes without sequins on them. Then a few years later, having to deal with awkward body changes without the comfort of "everybody's going through it too." No they weren't. They had already "been there done that." What I'm saying here is, y'know what's more awkward than all the adolescent changes that everyone goes through in middle school? Not going through those adolescent changes

3. Really, don't do drugs.

Because we don't have a guidance counselor to come visit every week in middle school, red ribbon week was a huge deal. There was only one week devoted to not doing drugs, so we had to go ALL OUT. There was a huge assembly to kick off the week, and every class, the teachers had to give us a fact about drugs. The freakiest thing was on Wednesday we had "dead day." Where names were drawn and the students who were drawn got their faces painted white and were told they were "dead." This represented statistically, how many deaths there are related to drugs. The paper explained how you died, and you weren't allowed to talk all day. Seriously, don't do drugs: they could kill you.

4. Sometimes you have to let people make their own mistakes.

I was a cheerleader in 8th grade, and I was a flyer. There was another girl who really wanted to be a flyer, but she was obviously not "flyer sized." I tried to reason with her in the nicest way possible (without telling her that she was simply too big), saying how she hasn't been tried with proper flyer technique, my bases aren't used to her as a flyer, etc. However, she would not take no for an answer. One game, she took my spot and was a flyer. They could not hold her up and dropped her multiple times. She realized that she couldn't be a flyer. Not everyone is willing to simply accept someone else's reason or experience, and you sometimes have to let people drop a girl in order to help her learn. 

5. Really this last point is just for uniformity...

For some reason, I don't have as many middle school memories as high school and elementary school. Middle school is kind of a modge podge of mismatched memories, and I was unable to come up with 5 real lessons from middle school. Honestly, number 2 doesn't reallly say much, so I barely came up with 4 lessons. Nevertheless, I wanted my "Life Lessons I Learned from School" posts to be uniform, so this point is here.

Life Lessons I Learned from Elementary School

I have decided to do a post series for the next 3 days on lessons that I've learned from different stages in my life. Before I move on to the next chapter in my life, I think it's important that I look back at the past chapters, and I thought you might benefit from my life lessons too. Plus, you seem to really like these list-y posts...

1. I'm not good at everything.

I am a member of what they're calling Generation Y, aka the Me Generation. 2 generations ago, our grandparents were the silent generation. Because of the Great Depression and World Wars, this generation was silent and were called the Silent Generation. When raising their kids, they didn't really know how to show love and encouragement in the best way (because of the hard conditions that they were raised in) and focused on success, so their kids grew up to become the Baby Boomers. The Baby Boomers grew up goal-oriented and competitive because of their harsh parents, and then they had kids. Generation Y is their kids. Kids generally do the opposite of what their parents do, so since the Baby Boomers were raised so harshly, they try to be as encouraging and loving as humanly possible towards their kids, so we are the Me Generation because we grow up being told that we are the best thing that's ever happened to this world and that we're amazing. In elementary school, I learned that I was not that amazing. I tried soccer, softball, swimming, tennis, and volleyball, and I was terrible. I had to come to the life-changing realization that I wasn't going to be amazing at everything, and sports were definitely not something that I was good at.

2. Resilience

However, not being amazing doesn't mean I shouldn't try. Being terrible at sports did not stop me from trying all of them. Every time I failed, I simply tried a different sport. I wasn't going to simply give up. Not being good at everything is not a reason to give up. Sometimes I will fail, but I will keep trying until I succeed (or in the case of sports, move on because I was never going to succeed at sports).

3. Don't do drugs.

Once a week the guidance counselor would come and tell us not to do drugs. Occasionally, she talked about being healthy or stranger danger, but even so, she would find a way to work drugs into the lesson... Stay healthy by eating right, exercising, and not doing drugs... Strangers are dangerous because they will try to sneak you drugs... etc. Drugs are bad, and you shouldn't do them. 

4. Knowledge is power.

I was in the gifted and talented program, and I had an older sister. I pretty much knew everything, or at least I knew more than the average elementary school kid, which I learned, made me really popular. In elementary school, everyone is at the point in their lives where they love knowing stuff and learning is still fun, so being the kid that could teach everyone extra stuff was really cool. In fifth grade, I would teach my classmates French at lunch. Now, if I tried to teach my friends French they would laugh and ignore me, but in elementary school, I was super cool. Since then, I've wanted to gain as much knowledge as possible, so I could stay on top. Now, I'm just that weird kid with the facts, but someday, it will pay off again! I'm just holding out for that day.

5. Have fun.

Life is fun. Don't waste your time on random un-fun things, like Spanish club every Thursday after school (especially if you don't like Spanish and plan on taking French). As you get older, you have less time, less energy, and less imagination, so having fun gets progressively harder. In elementary school, speaking French and learning to knit on colonial day was fun. Today, other people get annoyed if I start speaking a foreign language and knitting is time consuming, hard, and never turns out right. Relish every moment of fun because fun gets harder.

A note to parents and how senior year feels

"Are you excited about graduating?"
"It depends on the day."

People don't seem to understand what I mean when I tell them, "it depends on the day." I really do mean that it depends on the day. I'm supposed to be excited and overjoyed that I'm finally moving on to be independent, but oftentimes I'm not. It's terrifying.
I've gone all my life under the constant supervision and protection of my parents, and now I'm just going to go be independent. That's scary. My dad is the micromanaging type of parent. My life IS his life, especially for the last 6 years since my sister graduated. There are some pros and cons to being micromanaged all my life. Pro: I know all the right things. My dad has made sure that I know what I'm supposed to do and when I'm supposed to do it, who I'm supposed to talk to and what I'm supposed to say, what I'm supposed to wear and where I'm supposed to be, etc. I know all the right things, and it's definitely helped me to succeed in my life so far. Con: He's not going to be there to micromanage me any more. Although he's equipped with all the right knowledge, I'm now going to have to remember what and when, who and what, and what and where all on my own. I'm going to have to wake up, dress myself, feed myself, and take care of myself without anyone there yelling at me constantly to straighten up and get things done. There's no one there micromanaging me to make sure that I don't screw up. I have to make sure that I don't screw up all on my own. That's freaky. That's a lot of responsibility to take on suddenly.
Here's my recommendation to all you parents out there (since I know at least 90% of my readers are parents... which I'm totally okay with... recommend me to your friends;), micromanage the heck out of your kids through elementary and middle school. This way they get the healthy habits and the know-how instilled in them at an early age. Plus, they'll also get the notion that you really do know everything from basic arithmetic to trigonometry, from how to suck up to teachers to get good grades to how to be a leader in school, and from how to put together a rush packet for sororities to how to apply for scholarships. When you micromanage, it shows us that you know everything. However, when your kid reaches high school, slowly start to back off a bit. Obviously, they still need you to hover over their shoulders to some extent, to ensure they're still doing their homework, making good choices, etc., but by backing off, you're transferring some of the responsibility to your child. Now, when they go to college, they won't suddenly be handling things on their own for the first time.
This is what gives me my anxiety. I went to the dentist today, and he told me that I shouldn't have as much damage as I do from grinding my teeth until I'm around 25 or so at the earliest, so yeah... there's that. Don't get me wrong though. I am very excited for college, and with some help from my friends and family, I think I'll be able to get along just fine.
It's a complicated emotion that I have towards everything right now. It's like when you realize for the first time that the boy you've been crushing on forever likes you back. You're really excited because it's mutual and whatnot. However, you're worried because you thought that he would never like you in a million years, and you're not sure how everything is going to work itself out. College is my newly discovered mutual crush, and I'm freaking out because it's like he just asked me out (admission). I'm worried about how the relationship is going to work out, but if I give it some time, I'm sure everything will work out (at least until we have a mutual breakup and part ways in 4 years). And that's why you're hear, reading (and recommending to your friends) my blog: so you can be the bestfriend that I always gush to about the relationship. Thanks for listening to me gush <3

139 more days... Until then keep calm and boomer sooner.

How to make sure your roommate isn't psycho

So, you've picked a college... that means the life altering decisions are over, right? WRONG. Next, it's time to pick your roommate. There are various different processes you can do to go about finding the perfect roommate. Here are my thoughts on the roommate picking process.

1. Potluck is not a good idea.

My sister had a friend who went to college and did potluck. Long story short, the roommate used Facebook to pretend to be a guy and date her roommate. If that's not enough to scare you out of potluck, simply google "roommate horror stories." I once read a story where the this girl's roommate's insane boyfriend put glass and drano chemicals in her roommate's food after she told him to stop hanging around their room. This girl had to go to the ER, puking up blood, and she literally almost died. Remember the movie with Leighton Meester? That could be your life. In conclusion, if you go potluck, your roommate's boyfriend might try to KILL YOU.

2. The Facebook method

I have a lot of friends who are currently searching for or have picked their roommate using the Facebook method. Tons of colleges have Facebook groups for their incoming freshman, where people post some basic information about themselves, saying they are "looking for a roommate." From there, you message anyone that seems like they might make a good fit or anyone that comments on your request for a roommate in order to get to know eachother better. This way, you know what you're getting. You can see the person's photos and have an actual conversation before you move in with a crazy. However, ALWAYS meet your roommate IN PERSON. Have you ever seen the show Catfish? Although some of it looks fake, the situation is possible. You need to be careful, and meet your roommate in person. Do not trust Facebook wholeheartedly! Even so, as long as you meet in person, I think using Facebook is a great option, especially for people going to smaller schools or schools where they don't know anyone.

3. Friend of a friend

This is another method that I completely support. Room with a friend of a friend. 

"Oh you're going to OU? I have this friend from another school in the area that's going there too! Y'all should room together! Here let me give you her information."

This is a great idea. You can get to know each other and see if you're compatible as roommates, and it's easy since you're probably in the same area. Plus, if your friend is her friend, she's probably not psycho. Obviously, you still need to meet and see if you have that magical roommate connection, but this way you know your roommate isn't crazy, while still getting to meet someone new.

4. Ignore what people tell you and room with you BFF

This is what I'm doing. My roommate has been on the drill team (dance team) at school with me for 2 years now. She's not my absolute closest bestie for the restie, but we are definitely bestfriends. I know that rooming with your bestfriend is supposed to be completely off limits, but my sister roomed with her bestfriend since childhood. They're still good. My sister is going to be the matron of honor in her wedding this summer, so trust me; it didn't ruin their friendship. I understand the worries of rooming with someone you're so close to, but I think that you should be able to tell if your friend is someone you can or can't room with. Many of my friends I COULD NOT room with, but my roommate and I are very compatible. We are similar enough where we have fun together, but we are different enough where our lives won't be overwhelmed by each other's presence. I like this method because I know what I'm getting into. On various trips with drill team, we've roomed together, and I know all about her. I know her quirks and pet peeves. I'm not going in blind, but when rooming with your bestfriend, use your judgment. Not everyone can room with their bestfriend.

5. Just some things to consider when picking a rooommate

-sleeping habits

-religion

-cleanliness

-study habits

-social habits: drinking, smoking, late nights, parties, bringing guys home, etc.

-anything you can possibly think of: remember you are living with this person!

These are my tips and opinions on roommates for now. They could very easily change in the next few months. Everything could go horribly wrong for my roommate and I. Maybe she's just faking being my bestfriend. Maybe she really IS a killer. I'll let you know if I end up in the hospital.... Wish me luck!

140 more days... Until then keep calm and boomer sooner!

College Choices: AKA a huge and terrifying choice that will change your life forever

This August, I'll be going to the University of Oklahoma in Norman to pursue a degree in journalism with an additional emphasis in advertising. I only applied to two schools: Oklahoma and Missouri, but I decided pretty early on where I was going to go. Tons of people kept asking me how I made my decision. These are the biggest things that influenced my decision.... and if you're unsure of where to start, I think Oklahoma is a pretty option if I may say so myself.

1. Location 

For me, this means two things: how far I have to travel and weather. I pretty much drew a line across the United States because I didn't want to go anywhere too cold. Many people forget to think about things like this in their choices. Traveling is also a big deal. How far away from home do you want to be? One of the reasons I chose Oklahoma over Missouri was because of distance. I wanted to be able to drive home for a quick weekend if I something were to happen where I needed to be home.

2. Numbers and Statistics

Number of students

Teacher:Student ratio

Average SAT

COST: This is obviously a big one. What can you afford?! Student loans are NOT a good idea IF you can avoid them

Average number of graduates with jobs

Guy:girl ratio

Scholarships

etc. etc. etc. When you start the search process, you'll hear lots and lots of numbers that might not mean much to you, but when you get more into the search, these numbers become more and more important. I recommend keeping a record of the information from schools that you're really interested in. Here's an example of a college comparison chart that is given out at UNT... 

http://howtochoose.unt.edu/sites/all/files/How-to-Choose-toolkit.pdf

3. Campus Living

What do you want your college experience to look like? Do you want to go to every football game and be super gung-ho about school spirit? Then you might want to nix any colleges that don't have a football team. Do you plan on joining fraternities or sororities? You'd need to look into what the campus has to offer. I love all of the Christian organizations and the Greek life found on the OU campus. 

4. Education

This is about your education. If you have an idea of what you'd like to major in, look at schools that are known for their programs. However, remember prestige isn't everything. I looked at schools like Vanderbilt, Columbia, and the University of North Carolina for a while, and even though I had a pretty good chance of getting in, I didn't like the more prestigious schools. They weren't the place for me. Mizzou is often seen as the top journalism in the nation, while Oklahoma is only up and coming. However, I chose OU. In the end, I'll probably get more personal attention and learn just as much from the program at OU because I won't be competing with as many people within the school of journalism. Go where you think you'll be most likely to succeed, which is not necessarily the top school.

5. Go with your gut

This was the biggest part for me, and when I try to explain to my friends, they kinda think I'm crazy. Oklahoma felt right. I was simply more comfortable on the campus. I was more excited about what it had to offer. I envisioned myself at both OU and Mizzou, and it wasn't hard to decide from there. For a while, I wanted to go to Mizzou. I knew the program was better, so I thought it was a better option for me, but after visiting both schools 3 times each, I couldn't deny it any longer. 

Oklahoma felt like more of a home. 

142 more days... Until then keep calm and boomer sooner!

Laundry: esp. the stuff you can't dry

I'm used to having my washing machine and dryer in our family's utility room. It's no biggie to wash clothes. You put the clothes in the washing machine, pour the detergent that in kept in the cabinet above the machine, close it, and push the button. When the cycle finishes, you put the clothes that can be dried in the dryer and hang the others up on the rack behind you. I was folding my clothes the other day when I first realized that laundry is going to be very different in college.
For one thing I'm going to have to pay to use the washing machine! I remember my parents sending my sister rolls of quarters, but I never actually considered how different that is. Whenever I want to wash my clothes, I'm going to have to search through my things for some change, and as someone who normally doesn't use cash, this may be a problem. I'm going to have to get a piggy bank or something...
Next, the laundry room is not part of my house, which has two huge consequences. 1. I cannot just bring my clothes to the utility room whenever I want and deal with them later. I have to plan out when I have time to go wash my clothes because it will most likely involve lugging my laundry bag down a flight of stairs along with my detergent and whatever else I may need because there's not a convenient cabinet full of laundry essentials at my disposal at college. 2. There's not a convenient drying rack. What do I do with all my clothes that I can't just toss in the dryer? Do I have to carry my dripping wet clothes on their hangers back up the stairs and hang them on a towel rack in the bathroom? This is actually a question that I don't know the answer to, and I will let you know when I do. This may not be something many people consider before going to college, but this is a predicament I am sincerely worried about...

143 more days... Until then keep calm and boomer sooner!

Chevrons Dresses and Bubble Necklaces

I move into my dorm at the University of Oklahoma in 145 days to pursue a degree in journalism with an emphasis in advertising. Contrary to what I tell some people, I'm actually quite terrified. I have no idea what I'm going to do living on my own, but for now, I've still got 145 more days to figure it out. My older sister told me to start a blog, so here it is. This is my journey to college and my experiences once I get there.
You may be thinking to yourself, "What in the world does that have to do with chevron dresses and bubble necklaces?" It has a lot to do with it, actually. It just goes to show how completely lost I am when it comes to college. I have no idea what I'm doing. My friends and I were talking the other day, and we all have this mental picture of girls in black and white chevron dresses and bubble necklaces the school's color at football games. That's what we are excited for. We are excited to look cute in our preppy, school colored outfits. I feel like this is a very good picture of how completely and entirely lost I am, and how I have little to no idea what to expect as I venture onto independence!
That is what this blog is for. I have amazing people in my life and examples to guide me as I push onward. I invite you to join me on this big adventure called life and tackle the many obstacles of growing up with me. This way, when you find yourself in my shoes, beginning to glimpse the real world for the first time, you've already learned from many of my mistakes, so you don't have to make as many on your own. You're welcome.
I've got the red bubble necklace and flats already. I just need to chevron dress. Then I'll be set.

145 more days.... Keep calm and boomer sooner!